I am so excited about this post, y’all. I don’t know about you, but my husband is SO. HARD. TO. SHOP. FOR. When asked what he would like for Christmas or his birthday, his response is almost always, “I don’t need anything. Just skip me. I’ve got everything I need.” Theoretically, this is probably true. He probably doesn’t need anything other than new underwear and socks. BUT. But I love to spoil him, so that’s not really going to cut it for me. Poor guy.
I’ve put together a totally obnoxious gift guide for my hubs that will hopefully help some of the other wives out there with gift ideas for their equally as difficult to shop for husbands. This is all in fun, and by no means am I buying anything or everything on this list for my husband. Because that would be ridiculous. Maybe one day… but not today. Because money doesn’t grow on trees, cancer is expensive, kids are expensive, food is expensive, health insurance is expensive, being an adult is expensive, life is expensive, building a house is expensive, and being a resident doesn’t pay very well. Sigh.
Okay. So here’s how it’s going to go down. I’m going to divide this list into three categories– big ticket items, practical stuff, and stocking stuffers.
Big Ticket Items (and some slightly outrageous wish list items)
(1) The Big One. The CFP Tickets. Assuming your team is in, of course. Which ours is. Every year. So this is usually a pretty sweet option for my man. 2018 Sugar Bowl tickets (Bama vs. Clemson) – These currently run about $300 apiece on StubHub, and they’re sold out everywhere else. And since you’d need two of them, that puts you out $600. And that doesn’t include driving to get there (because we would drive– it’s about 10-12 hours away, but we definitely wouldn’t be flying). And the hotel room. Which I’m pretty positive, all hotels are probably sold out or jacking up their prices as we speak right now. So unless I can find a babysitter, and Matt can get off work, this is probably a pipe dream for us this year. But our time will come, and Alabama will be in the playoffs every year for the foreseeable future. Not a luxury that most fanbases can count on, so it’s alright if we sit this one out. Roll Tide!
(2) 15-foot Trampoline with Enclosure (Skywalker Trampolines – $250.49 on sale from $399.99 at Toys R Us, sold in stores). Because trampolines are FUN. And they’re great for cardio if you wanna have a bounce with your toddlers. It’s got a safety net, so unless you’re a weird kid like me and decide to play underneath the trampoline while people are jumping– leading to a broken nose and a rhinoplasty as a fourth grade girl, then it’s pretty safe. I’d let my two and three-year-olds play on it with daddy and me. Side note: this is also a sweet gift for me because my parents never got my sisters and me one growing up– probably because of the broken nose debacle. My bad.
(3) YETI Coolers Tundra 35 ($299.99 at Palmetto Moon, Dick’s Sporting Goods, Academy Sports and Outdoors, etc.). Doesn’t every southern man own one of these or wish to own one of these already? I’m pretty sure the answer is yes, and I’m also pretty sure we are the last few remaining beach-going/river-cruising/outdoorsy South Carolinians that haven’t splurged on one of these babies yet. These coolers are just top of the line. And they’re totally chic, and apparently they last forever, so it’s a pretty good investment if you spend a lot of time outside. Which we do. But coming in at $300, we’re probably not going to be getting one of these until daddy’s making a full physician’s salary as opposed to a resident’s. I’m told patience is a virtue.
(4) Barbour Men’s Rivington Waterproof Jacket in olive ($369.00 at select retailers– usually the preppy good ole’ boy stores will have them in stock. In Columbia, Granger Owings on Main Street stocks them, but that’s pretty much the only place I know of unless you want to buy online, but I wouldn’t recommend that because they’re hard to find, and you want to make sure it fits if you’re dropping that much on a coat. Just saying. But you can check on their website to find a retailer near you. These jackets are fabulous. They’re rugged and simple, and totally classic. This is definitely an investment, but I can tell you that if I get Matt one of these, he will wear the hell out of it for at least the next 30 years. Unless he gets fat. Which he won’t, because he’s a doctor, and I want him to live a long time.
(5) Super Nintendo Classic Edition. Retail price $79.99. BUT it’s sold out EVERYWHERE. Releasing it on Black Friday was totally cool and everything, but I’m not one to wait outside Target, Walmart, GameStop, or Best Buy from midnight to 5am just to buy an effing Christmas present. If you can find one of these, then YOU GO GLEN COCO. But I’m not getting my hopes up. I’ll probably buy Matt one for his birthday in May, when these will probably be restocked. This system is almost as cool as my N64, and I’d actually give it the slight edge because it comes pre-loaded with all of the classic games– Donkey Kong, Mario Kart, Super Mario, Zelda, etc. Totally worth paying double on eBay if you can find a reputable seller.
(1) Royal Pine Gingham Sport Shirt ($99.99 from Southern Tide) or Sullivans Solid Sport Shirt in light pink ($99.50 from Southern Tide). My man can never have enough button down shirts. You can dress them up or down (roll the sleeves up)– Church, work (as a doctor), dates with the wife, football games– you catch my drift. A real southern gentleman has plenty of these in his closet in many a color and pattern. Solid, colorblock, gingham, tattersall, plaid, pinstripe, etc. You just can’t ever have too many button downs.
(2) Ray Bans Classic Wayfarers (polarized) – $203.00. Every southern dude probably already owns a pair, but my dear husband lost his sometime this summer. So we need to replace them. These are his favorites. They go with everything, and they make us feel like we’re still in college and not getting old. So there’s that. Again, these can be dressed up or down. Perfect for football games, summer days on the river, or driving to work or outdoor events.
(3) Clarks Mens Wallabees ($140 from Nordstrom). These are just classic. They are going to be making a comeback in the next couple years– mark my words. Especially for women. Because I’m going to be asking for a pair of these myself to go with my fave flare jeans. Yes, flare jeans are also making a comeback. You heard it here first! These babies are super comfy and durable– in fact, the only reason he needs a new pair is because his old pair has lasted for the last ten years (practically since we started dating in high school). These shoes will never go out of style. Hell, our parents wore them in college. Just ask your mom and dad. If they had any ounce of prep or good ole’ boy in them, then they owned a pair of these.
(4) FitBit Charge in black (from Target, depending on whether you get a small or large, you can save a ton. Smalls run $88.00, and Larges run $129.00. I don’t know what the difference is, but it’s adjustable, so I’m thinking my hubs could get away with wearing a small). If your husband is anything like mine and has problems fitting in a workout during his days on call, then this is a great idea. He will wear this and track his own progress, and probably become obsessed with getting 10K steps in each day. It just holds him accountable and leads to better choices. For the guy that wants to spend his free time with his family instead of working out. This is a must. And it all syncs to your iPhone if you want it to, so that’s cool too.
(5) True Grit (on sale for $120.00) at The Sherpa Pullover Outlet. Because that’s a thing? I’ve had mine for a couple years, and let me just tell you, these pullovers are AMAZING. Imagine wearing a soft fuzzy blanket. It might make you look bigger than you are, but it’s so dang comfy that, frankly, I don’t give a damn. It is SO warm. For southerners like you (and me) that just can’t hang with these few 30 degree weeks during December and January, it’s the perfect solution. Just remember to take it off once you get inside because it is really warm.
(1) Daniel Wellington Watch. The Classic Durham in rose gold. While it’s pretty affordable already (for a luxe watch) at $199, you can use the code: DIXIEBELLE for 15% off your order. Totally worth it for a gorgeous watch that works. Matt loves his. It looks great with his white coat (#doctorproblems), and it is pretty enough to go to church, but it is casual enough that it can also go to tailgates or a day out around town.
(2) Socks. Your man can never have enough socks. This website has you covered. They’ve got fab socks for $10.00 to $12.00, and these are my favorite. (a) Flamingos. I love flamingos, so I’m going to buy him flamingo socks. (b) Sharks. I love sharks. We all love sharks. These are just a necessity. (c) The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Because that’s Cole’s and Reese’s favorite book, and how adorable are these socks?! (d) Poe. “I’m just a Poe boy, nobody loves me…He’s just a Poe boy from a Poe family…” If you didn’t find that punny, then you need to reevaluate your life. (e) Obama socks. We’re not his biggest fans, but these would definitely be a good conversation starter should Dr. Matt ever come in contact with an awkward patient. (f) Gumby socks. I was (am) terrified of Gumby as a child. I don’t know why, but that little green dude just seems shady to me. But the socks are cool. (g) Republican socks. Because we’re white-collared South Carolinians who went to private school and graduated from college. Pretentious? Maybe. Am I sorry? Absolutely not. (h) Rollin’ with my gnomies. Because the 90s will never die. So in short, socks are bae, and you should buy some for your hubs because he can never have too many.
(3) Fresh Balls (because I’m funny and nasty sometimes, and he will think this is hilarious) $12.00 from this hilariously cool website. Y’all know your husbands smell sometimes. It’s just a fact of life. Guys stink, and I think this would make a fabulous gag gift.
(4) Skipjack Play Long Sleeve Tee Shirt in Bama Style ($46 from Southern Tide). your husband can never own enough tee shirts. When this guy isn’t in scrubs or a white coat, he’s wearing a tee shirt 85% of the time. And sometimes it gets chilly in South Carolina, so long-sleeved tees are a good go-to. I like this one because I like football. And I don’t think he has any red shirts. Sweet.
(5) YETI Washed Low Pro Trucker Hat ($19.99 from Palmetto Moon). He needs a hat. Everyone needs a hat. This hat is awesome. It wears well, and it ages well. Size is totally adjustable too which is good because my husband has a big old noggin. This hat will last through the whole year and well into summertime. Perfect for the beach. Thinking warm thoughts.