Merry Christmas everyone! I hope everyone had a fabulous Christmas– I hope that each and every one of you got to spend enough time with your families and loved ones to last you until next Christmas. Just kidding. If there’s one thing I’ve realized over the past couple of years, there’s no such thing as too much (or even enough) time with family. Time spent with family is time well spent, in my book.
That being said, holidays around here are crazy. It starts with Thanksgiving, and it doesn’t stop until New Year’s Day. By that point, the Mazzola family will have celebrated the holidays with my dad’s sister and her husband (Thanksgiving #1), my parents and sister (Thanksgiving #2), Matt’s mother and stepdad and stepbrother and family friends (Thanksgiving #3), my granny and my mom’s siblings (Thanksgiving #4), Matt’s dad and stepmom (Christmas #1), my parents and sisters again (Christmas morning), Matt’s mom and stepdad and the boys’ great grandmother and family friends (Christmas lunch/dinner), and my college best friends (NYE– NO KIDS ALLOWED! WHOOP WHOOP! Momma’s not pregnant this year, so I’m going to get lit! Or turnt up– whatever the cool kids are saying these days). HOLY SH*T. That’s a lot of celebrating. No wonder people gain weight. I should make a new years resolution to start working out, but let’s be real. Probably not going to happen. Ahh well.
It is 72 degrees outside right now. Christmas day. South Carolina, have I told you you’re my favorite? I’m wearing shorts right now, and let me tell you, I didn’t even mind having to shave my legs to put these babies on. More details on that tomorrow for Momiform Monday because it’s going to be 70 again, and I’m totally going to wear the same thing again.
The warm weather and sunshine have been doing this momma’s heart some good because I’ve been having a rough time missing baby James. I should be getting ready to meet my sweet boy in a couple months– I shouldn’t be looking forward to getting to party on New Year’s. I shouldn’t be wearing a beautiful angel necklace with an October birthstone in the center that my sweet husband got for me so that I can always have him close to my heart. I should be planning to welcome my third sweet boy in March. This road sure isn’t easy to travel during the holidays. Especially not for someone whose favorite thing in the world is being a mother. I love being a mom with every fiber of my being. I would never have picked this life out for me if I was writing my own story, but God knows so much better than we ever do. I am so thankful for that.
We got to visit our sweet boy yesterday– Christmas Eve. I wanted to wish him a Merry Christmas, and I didn’t want him to be alone on what should be the happiest holiday of the year. As silly as it probably sounds to most, yes I understand that he is in Heaven and is happier than we could ever begin to imagine; but I still think of him being where we buried him with the magnolia tree at the river, and I get all torn up inside thinking about him getting cold and being by himself. I don’t even know if that makes sense to anyone else, but it’s something I struggle with.
Cole and Reese got to run around in the woods in the gorgeous 70 degree weather, and though it got dark before we could take a boat ride, we had a good time running around as a family. Cole is so sweet when we go see James to water the tree. He always picks out a really great stick or rock (boys will be boys) and places it underneath the tree with a kiss and a “bye bye James.” Y’all. It just melts my heart. He understands so much more than I give him credit for. And I guess that’s to be expected seeing as he’s become a brother twice in his short 2.5 years, and he’s lost one of those brothers during that time too. Reese still doesn’t really have a clue, but he’s always excited to go out to the river, and he’ll catch on soon.
As far as Christmas goes, we were extremely blessed this year. For living off of student loans (med school problems), we did quite well for ourselves I would say (Momma sold some high chairs this year, and did some interior decorating work on the side, so that helped). And our families hooked us up, as usual. I hope my boys grow up to be as grateful and humble as can be because they sure are spoiled. Like, is it possible to have every single toy that was ever made? Because I feel like we’re getting to that point. I am going to have to do a major overhaul and clean out some of their toys soon. Spring cleaning and a huge Goodwill donation will make my basic-millennial-do-it-better-than-the-joneses self feel better about the fact that these children will never want for anything. Hashtag blessed, right?
Spoiled? HECK YES. But, I am also a big proponent of paying it forward. The only thing that makes me happier than receiving a gift is giving a gift. That’s how it should be, I think.